Hello, my name is Trae and I'm a cosmic bee, but I live on planet earth for now. I chose to incarnate into this human body about 45 earth years ago for reasons that I did not start to realize until I was more than three decades into my mission, and I cannot remember a time when I didn't feel profoundly out of place here. I will use this blog to log my earth mission experiences, as well as the many lessons learned here.
The film, E.T. - The Extraterrestrial came out in theaters when I was three going on four years old, and my earth parents took us to go see it. "It'll be fun!" they said. This would be one of several early memories of me realizing that I was very different, even from my own family.
I was immediately overwhelmed and overstimulated by the huge movie screen and the thunderous sounds in the theater, as well as the chattering and snacking noises around us from other movie-goers, all of which my parents and older siblings did not seem to notice.
The movie starts and I'm trying to regulate my four year old, overstimulated brain so I could concentrate on the movie screen. Spoiler alert: In one of the first scenes, E.T. the extraterrestrial gets accidentally left behind on earth by his mission crew. I started crying and my family thought that I was scared of E.T., when really I was scared for E.T. I was feeling immense empathy and concern for him, but I was far too young to articulate that depth of human emotion to them. This particular emotional trait would end up being a source of much pain, confusion, isolation, and yes, alienation throughout this earth experience, but also self awareness and lucidity.
As I stated earlier, I didn't start finding out until I was well into my third decade that there was a name for what I was and that there were others like me. I am not big on 3D labels, but these particular labels were tremendously helpful during a truly difficult shift in my experience. I'm an empath and an HSP, (highly sensitive person), an "indigo child", an "old soul", a "starseed", And I didn't find out until I was 40 that I was also autistic. Yippie! These realizations have led to a turbulent, yet beautifully eye-opening path of remembering my true self, down into a deep, geometrical cosmic bee hive of innerstanding, which I will elaborate on much more in future posts, I'm sure!
